You know that feeling when your brain is on the verge of exploding? That has been me lately every time I think of my blog. I felt terrible because I just didn’t feel like posting. I was making myself crazy, it stressed me out. It sounds so little but it really bothered me, I felt like I owed it to you, which is ridiculous. And until this morning I had loads of windows open on my computer, searching for post ideas on Pinterest. But somehow none of them sounded good because well, they had no purpose, they were literally useless. I would have been spending time on something that isn’t even productive and I hate that feeling. Because art is supposed to bring you a feeling, or an information yet so many things on the internet are useless. And I just didn’t want to be part of that. Lots of my posts were just written for the sake of writing something but it felt more like a chore than anything and I honestly wasn’t having fun. So I finally came to the conclusion that something HAS to change because I actually started to hate being here and it didn’t feel like my personal corner anymore. It’s so hard not to write to please people, I have to remind myself that the point of starting a blog was to have somewhere to let out my feelings, not to become a full-time blogger (I completely respect the people that do that but it just isn’t for me.)
Today I took the time to go through my thoughts, well I actually started off the day trying to find ideas but I was going crazy and in a really foul mood (sorry mum..). But right now I’m realising I shouldn’t have to put so much time into it. So instead of writing a useless post, I’m going to be talking about my plans and explaining my fresh new start (now that the ramble is over haha).
The thing is, lot’s of people have a passion, you know like one thing they’re meant for and fire goes through them when doing what they love. The problem I have so many things that I like, I mean I play music, I dance ballet, I take photos and I write. Yet I want something that I really want to work for. Like actually see a future in. Honestly, music and dance are off the table, I can’t see myself doing that for years or make a career out of them. I’m also quite good at school and I want to study, I actually enjoy the idea of that. And I’ve been thinking of doing forensic sciences (as in criminology) but I somehow want to incorporate photography into that. I really want to do that for years, I love the idea of being a photographer yet also having an academical job.
New fresh start
Speaking of photography, I want to have a new fresh start here. I don’t want to write pointless posts, I want to share my tips and experiences and photos. I want this corner to be a mixture of my personal life, maybe lists (music, films, series, books) and photography. I don’t see myself at all as a beauty or “lifestyle” blogger, I just see myself, well, as me!
So yeah thanks for reading if you have come ’till here 🙂
XOXO, Rosie <3